On Wednesday, the Mt. Hoods humanities department hosted an emotion-laden reading in the Studio Theater by MHCC instructor and U.S. Army veteran Sean Davis, who wrote a memoir about his military experience, followed by a performance of a one-act play he also wrote.
Davis started writing The Wax Bullet War from a first-person perspective, but then went to a third person narrative, only to go back to a first-person to be more connected to the project. When he kicked off his book tour last fall, he read at Mt. Hood in the Visual Arts Theater.
The book took him eight years to write and brought out a lot of emotion. I was crying at the kitchen table after everyone went to sleep, he said.
Davis wrote the play because he was asked to do so. I kind of always say yes to everything, and when someone asked me, Hey, do you want to write a play? Im like, yeah, of course now I gotta figure out how to write a play.
He said he realized that he enjoyed seeing the play work out and come alive on stage.
I think were all narcissistic maniacs, like, My voice needs to be heard. Writings hard, but then you see your words unfold on stage its like instant gratification, its awesome, he said.
The play is titled A Chaos of Stars and is based on Davis conversations with his friend, Alex, who came back off of his second tour and started doing some really heavy drugs, and his life was just wrecked, he explained.
Alexs mother reached out to Davis, and Davis took his friend in and helped him get his life together.
I wanted it to be an inspiring story to try and help other veterans out, that they could do it, they can get past this stuff, he said.
Besides writing and teaching writing at Mt. Hood, Davis spends time at local American Legion posts, helping vets balance civilian life after returning from combat.
A lot of us veterans, we dont really have a good control of our emotions after we come back, said Davis. Were kind of disconnected, and we just dont care, or we want to care but it just doesnt happen that way.
The disconnectedness and emotional difficulties of what is referred to as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) are the main themes in Davis play. When talking about measures to be taken to make troops entering the military aware of potential emotional risks down the road, he said, Dont have any more wars.
Id tell everybody to vote, vote for better people, and so maybe we wont do stupid wars like this (Iraq war). It made no sense, we knew it made no sense when we went over there, he said.
As far as individuals and telling them what theyre going to expect, theres nothing you can do. I dont even like the term PTSD it just already implies that it had happened in the past. The actual nature of it, is that its happening always – all the death and horrible things I saw, they dont leave you, man.
Theyre always with you, so its not like its post-anything. Its always here, its very difficult to live with.
Davis said he would prefer if PTSD was referred to as Soldiers Heart, a term that originated during the American Civil War. They didnt mean anything poetic by it it was like tennis elbow, or planters wart. They thought the soldiers were going there and seeing combat, (comrades) being blown up so many times, it affected their heart, so they had a heart murmur.
Davis enrolled at Mt. Hood himself as soon as Veterans Affairs told him he could. I went continually, as soon as they told me I could go to school, I just went, he said.
Now hes busy teaching others. I always wanted to teach, I always wanted to write, and honestly, I use the same skill-set as when I was in the military. Being a squad leader, or being a professor, or teacher, or instructor, whatever, are very close to the same thing.
